28 Days, 28 Tips: Day 26

February is National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month.
In order to shine light on dating abuse, I’m posting 28 Tips for 28 Days. Stop by each day this month and discover stats that may shock you. Tips that can help you. Links that can save a life.
Knowledge and understanding are our best weapons in fighting what has become a silent epidemic among teens!

Day 26, Tip 26:

6 Early Signs of an Abusive Relationship:
This is from an article by Pamela Jacobs, an advocate and attorney who helps women to reclaim their lives after abuse. http://pamela jacobs.com

1. He will romance you
   You’ll find yourself thinking, “He’s too good to be true.” And he is.
2. He’ll want to commit quickly.
   He’ll want you to be exclusive right away—committed. It’ll feel fast to you—trust your instincts.
3. He will want you all to himself.
   His jealousy will grow to include everyone including your friends and your family. He won’t want you to be with anyone else. This is the start of isolating you.
4. He will be very concerned about you.
   He’ll mask his control of you as concern, but that’s what it is: control. He’ll want to know every detail of your life and soon you’ll be asking for his approval so he doesn’t get upset. His power will grow and control of your own life will slip away.
5. He will be sweet and caring—sometimes.
   Other times, he will be cold and cruel and you’ll stay with him because he’ll make you think it’s your fault, and because you’ll hope for the return of the guy you fell for.
6. He will play the victim.
   Everything is always someone else’s fault. You will be expected to make him happy. When he’s not, he will blame you.

Control, jealousy, isolation, obsession. These are not love. These are abuse.  If you or someone you know is involved in a relationship that looks, sounds or feels anything like this, then get help. Today.  1-800-799-SAFE (7233)

• Books can make it easier to broach the topic. There are a lot of stories about relationship abuse that can get your teen thinking…questioning. Die for You is just one. I hope it can make a difference in the life of someone you love. 

“This taut thriller unrolls hidden messages of abusive relationships with a sharp edge and well-drawn gray areas, leaving readers on the edge of their seats.” — Booklist